Monday, November 2, 2015

The Dimensional Dogs Patron for Dungeon Crawl Classics RPG

The Dimensional Dogs

Before man, The Dimensional Dogs were. They dwelt among the angles of space before the establishment of law and chaos. While there, in that angled time, that alien space, they committed an act so foul and horrible that it is only referred to as “The Deed,” with no further explication. Even the gods blush at its mention. Mankind, descended from curved time, as opposed to angular time, was free from the taint of The Deed. For this reason alone, The Dimensional Dogs hunt, seeking to corrupt and eventually destroy the curved time in which man dwells. But this inherent purity of man is the very thing that allows a wizard to bind The Dimensional Dogs as patrons. Some claim that doing so is a lawful act, preventing the Dogs from interfering in the time and affairs of men. Others claim that binding them is an act of pure chaos, a feat that only a madman would attempt. But The Dimensional Dogs are beyond our notions of good and evil. They were before morals, they care not for the value judgments of man; they are driven only by their instinct. They are uncaring, and neutral to the core.

Invoke Patron check results:

12-13               The Dogs yawn in bored response to the invocation, paralyzing any one of the caster’s enemies for one round. There is no save. The caster may designate any single target within 100’.

14-17               The Dogs squeal with curiosity. The caster and all of his allies win initiative for the next 1d6+CL rounds. Also, all enemies within 100’ are slowed to half movement and may only attack every other round, though they may take other actions normally.

18-19               The Dogs awaken! The opponent that poses the greatest threat to the spellcaster clutches his or her chest (or wherever an equivalent to a heart might be located – substitute “life energy,” if the creature has no heart). The dogs have set his heart out of synchronization with the rest of his body, causing 2d6 points of damage and preventing any action for 1d4 rounds.

20-23               The Dogs turn. You have their attention now. The spellcaster is urged to hide in the nearest “angle,” which is suffused with a bright pink light to show the way. The angle may manifest in any crack or cleft that is not curved: e.g. the vertices of a room, a crack in the wall, even the meeting point to wooden joints. There, the Dogs shrink the spellcaster to a size that allows him to slip into the angle – a protective pocket dimension. While in the angle, the spellcaster is protected by a bubble that slows time. Weapons or damage-causing spells cause only 1 point of damage per successful attack. This lasts for 1d8+CL rounds. Outgoing spells or missile attacks from the spellcaster do maximum damage for the same duration. As the pocket dimension closes, the caster chooses a location within 50’ at which he will “land,” bypassing any opponents or physical obstacles along the way.

24-27               The Dogs growl. The caster and up to four allies gain 1d5 extra actions this round, all at their normal individual action die. This lasts for 1d5 rounds. All enemies are at half movement and may only attack every other round.

28-29               The Dogs yelp. One of the caster’s enemies, within 50’, is held in suspended animation, aware of everything happening around him, but completely unable to act. He can hear, see, smell, taste, and feel as normal. This lasts for a number of turns equal to the caster’s level. The suspended enemy may be subjected to anything the caster or others see fit to inflict on him until the effect wears off.

30-31               The Dogs bark. The caster, on any successful touch attack, suspends his touched target target, as in 28-29. He moves at double speed and gets 1d3 extra actions per turn for 1d4+CL rounds, after which the touch attack wears off. The suspended animation lasts for a number of turns equal to the caster’s level.

32+                  The Dogs howl! As 30-31, but the caster is also granted the ability to step back in time 1d4+CL rounds. This may “undo” other peoples’ actions for the intervening past rounds. If the caster successfully suspends an opponent in any past round, anyone attacked by that opponent is allowed an extra save, if appropriate or, if the opponent physically attacked someone during that previous time, the target of said attack must be attacked again, but from one step down the die chain this time (or is that “last time”?).

Patron Taint: The Dimensional Dogs

Breaching the wall between angular and curved time is not without consequence. When patron taint is indicated, roll 1d6 on the table below. When a caster has acquired all six taints at all levels of effect, there is no need to continue rolling any more.

Roll                 Result

1                      The stench of the angular dimensions of time clings to the caster, but only in wisps. He smells like the four day old corpse of a skunk that has been run over by a cart, doused in vinegar, then eaten and subsequently cut out of the lower intestines of a constipated minion of Bobugbubilz. He will never gain surprise on his enemies. The second time this is rolled, the caster permanently loses 1 point of Personality. The third time, no one, not even close friends and blood relatives, will come within 5’ of the caster. If they do (under compelling circumstances), they must make a save versus Fortitude or vomit for 1 round, losing all actions.

2                      The caster is out of synch with “real” time. All spells that he casts are delayed by one round. The second time this result is rolled, all spells cast are delayed by 1d3 rounds. The third time this is rolled, all spells are delayed by 1d5 rounds.

3                      One of the caster’s fingers withers through almost instantaneous aging and falls off (inflicting 1d2 points of damage). If the result is rolled a second time, the caster’s eye withers and falls out (inflicting 1d3 points of damage and a permanent loss of 1 point of Agility). The third time, an entire limb withers and falls off, inflicting 2d8 damage and a permanent loss of 3 points of Agility.

4                      The caster becomes obsessed with angles and will reject all items, clothing, etc., that have curves, no matter how beneficial they might be to him, electing only to allow angled items to touch him. The second time this result is rolled, the caster actively avoids curved surfaces in abject fear. This strange obsession leads him to behave awkwardly in most social situations, resulting in a permanent loss of 2 points of Personality. The third time this result is rolled, the caster must be within 1000’ of an angled structure (room, building, even the inside of a carriage, so long as it has corners) or suffer a point of damage per turn from repeatedly clawing at himself in an attempt to remove curved time from around him.

5                      The caster’s recollections of the past fade. Any casting result that would normally result in “failure, but spell is not lost” actually results in “Lost. Failure.” The second time this result is rolled, the spellcaster permanently loses the next lost spell and cannot relearn it. The third time this result its rolled, the spellcaster completely forgets his name and all history previous to the current week. This is perpetual, so that the caster can never remember more than a week into the past and has sudden “unrealizations” as memory calves off.

6                      The caster “slips” from our curved dimension of time into angular time, disappearing from our reality. This happens at a randomly-determined time (as determined by the judge) once per day. The absence is miniscule – not noticeable by anyone around him, but long enough to fumble any attack the caster was attempting or cause a spell to misfire. Once the slip has taken place in a 24 hour period, it will not happen again until the next 24 hour period. The second time this result is rolled, such slips happen twice a day and last a full round (which will be noticed by others). Note that while the caster disappears from the view of others, then appears again a round later, he is still susceptible to the effects of a fumble or miscast while in the dimension of angular time. Furthermore, the caster will be confused and unable to act until the end of the round after he returns (i.e., his action will always be last during the round after his return). The third time this result is rolled, he is affected by the 1 round time slip, as with the earlier effect, but will be confused and unable to take actions until the end of the last round for 1d8 rounds after his return.

Patron Spells: The Dimensional Dogs

Those bold enough to tug at The Dimensional Dogs' collars eventually learn three unique spells, as follows:

Level 1: Shimmertrain
Level 2: Angle of Repose
Level 3: Flatten Dimension

Spellburn: The Dimensional Dogs

The willful wizard will pour his personality into controlling the Dogs. The Dimension Dogs care little for your efforts. After all, you compelled them to bond with you! They reluctantly share a very limited portion of their powers, hoping that the corruption they sow by doing so will eventually lead to the dismantling of curved time, as they are very patient. This will require great magical strength on your part to bend them to your will. This will not be painless . . . When a caster utilizes spellburn, roll 1d4 and consult the table below or build off the suggestions to create an event specific to your home campaign:

Roll                 Spellburn Result

1                      The caster’s body “flickers” between chrono-biological ages, becoming younger, older, younger, even younger, suddenly very old, etc, in no particular order, leaving him spent, though at his true chronological age (expressed as Stamina, Strength, or Agility loss).

2                      The spellburn succeeds, but the caster is compelled to do whatever he can to add corners to any round room, tower, or building he enters or even sees for the next 1d4 months. Every effort must be made to create corners where none exist.

3                      All the curves on or in the caster’s body become straight and squared off before resuming their normal shape (expressed as Stamina, Strength, or Agility loss).

4                      The veil between angled and curved time has been pierced! Each point of spellburn counts as +2, however, the caster ages 2 years for each point thus spent (the judge decides the exact mechanical consequences of this based on the character and situation).


Level: 1 (The Dimensional Dogs)       Range: Varies              Duration: Varies          Casting time: 1 round             Save: None

General:                       The caster weaves his way between curved and angled time, disappearing or                  blurring as he moves through space.

Manifestation:             Roll 1d3: (1) Hundreds of phantom clocks, dials spinning wildly, emanate from the caster, then dissolve in the air. (2) An ectoplasmic projection emanates from the caster’s belly, slithering forth like a translucent snake, a manifestation of the future timestream ahead of the caster. (3) Glowing angles and curves (replete with accompanying glowing mathematical formulae describing each) swirl around the caster, then crash into one another and explode into sparks.

1                                  Lost, failure, and patron taint.
2-11                             Lost, failure

12-13                           The caster moves at three times his normal movement with no extra effort by slipping in and out of time in staccato bursts. He seems to rapidly appear and disappear as he moves. This lasts for one round.

14-17                           The caster steps completely out of curved time, taking one round to travel one turn’s worth of distance. During the round, he disappears from view, then reappears at the new location, after stepping back out of angled time and into the curved time stream. This lasts for one round.

18-19                           The caster moves at four times his normal movement with no extra effort and receives a +1 to AC for 1d3 rounds.

20-23                           The caster moves at five times his normal movement with no extra effort and receives a +2 to AC for 1d5 rounds. Furthermore, the rapidfire phasing in and out of time, combined with the strange latency of such movement, causes the “shimmertrain” effect for which the spell is named. Multiple casters seem to fade in and out of existence (which is, in some respects, true, according to some metaphysicists) with past casters slowly fading behind the present body and future casters slowly forming ahead of it. All enemies seeing this effect must make a Will save or be dazzled and unable to act for 1 round. Enemies must make this save each round the caster is in their field of vision.

24-27                           The shimmertrain has the same effect as (20-23), but the effect lasts for 3d4 rounds.

28-29                           The caster and up to three allies manifest the shimmertrain effect, as in (24-27).

30-31                           The caster and up to three allies manifest the shimmertrain with an even more pronounced effect. They are granted a +3 bonus to AC, Reflex saves, and attack rolls.

32+                              The caster and allies manifest the more pronounced shimmertrain effect of (30-31) and each gain 2 more actions per round at their lowest action die. This effect lasts for 6d6 rounds.

Angle of Repose

Level: 2 (The Dimensional Dogs)       Range: Varies              Duration: Varies          Casting time: 1 round             Save: None

General:                       The spellcaster and, possibly, allies, are able to take sanctuary in a pocket dimension of angled time, with various beneficial results.

Manifestations:           Roll 1d3: (1) An oozing, pink portal that reeks of dead animal guts and vinegar, opens in the air in front of the caster, (2) The caster (and possibly others), seem to disappear into the floor as if a yawning pit has opened beneath them, a pink light beams up into the sky from the pit, then the hole closes, seeming to swallow him (or them) whole, (3) The spellcaster (and possibly others) is “unfolded,” exposing their innards to the outer world, then he (or they) vanishes.

1                                  Lost, failure, and patron taint.

2-11                             Lost, failure.

12-13                           Failure, but spell is not lost.

14-15                           The caster disappears into the pocket dimension, hidden from all harm originating in curved time, for CL rounds, then reappears where he left. The pocket dimension (The Angle of Repose) is a strange place of non-euclidian geometries and cyclopean architecture dripping with colors that cannot be described by human words. Note that those in the dimensions of angled time are not safe from attacks originating in the dimensions of angled time.

16-19                           The caster disappears into the pocket dimension, hidden from all harm originating in curved time, for 1d6+CL rounds, then reappears where he left.

20-21                           The caster disappears into the pocket dimension, hidden from all harm, for 1d8+CL rounds. He may reappear anywhere within 50’ of his departure point.

22-25                           The caster and up to three allies disappear into the pocket dimension, hidden from all harm, for 1d10+CL rounds. Each ally may reappear anywhere within 50’ of their original departure point.

26-29                           The caster and all allies within 100’ disappear into the pocket dimension, hidden from all harm, for 1d12+CL rounds. Each person is healed of half of any previous damage sustained below their maximum hit points. Each may appear anywhere within 50’ of their original departure point.

30-31                           As (26-29), but the duration is 1d20+CL rounds. In addition to the ½ damage healing, all spellcasters may regain 1 spell lost earlier in the day.

32-33                           As (30-31), but all damage is healed for each person.

34+                              As (32-33), plus each ally gets three actions per round (at their lowest action die) for an additional CL rounds after emerging from the Angle of Repose.

Flatten Dimension

Level: 3                       Range: 30’       Casting time: 1 round             Save: Will versus Spell Check DC

General:                       The caster flattens himself or another into 2 dimensions.

Manifestation:             Roll 1d4: (1) Target’s body palpitates, bulges, and flattens into a figure that only has the dimensions of height and width, (2) A bright pink flash shines out from the area around the target, then fades to reveal the new form, (3) the target’s body suddenly flattens in large round patches, as if being crushed flat by a giant mallet, (4) specks and shreds of material seem to drift off the target, who loses volume and becomes flat. The wisps of matter soon fade into nothing ness.

1                                  Lost, failure, and patron taint.

2-11                             Lost, failure.

12-17                           Failure, but spell is not lost

18-19                           The caster can flatten himself into two dimensions, losing depth but retaining height and width. He is invisible if viewed side-on and can slip between cracks that are large enough to accommodate his height or width. Thus, a flattened subject may pass through the crack between a door and its doorjam (stepping between hinges or stooping under the latch) or under a door, but not through the crack between a chest’s lid and body (though, depending on the size of the chest, he may be able to put his head inside or slip a hand through to feel around inside). This flatness also allows the subject a +3 to AC for the duration of the spell. Thieves who are subject to this spell gain a +5 bonus to Hide in Shadows. Flatness lasts 1 minute per CL. The subject may give up their two dimensionality and return to 3 dimensions at any time, but stays in 3 dimensions once he has reverted back.

20-23                           The caster can flatten himself or one other target into two dimensions, as described in (18-19). The target is allowed a Will save to negate the flattening if he is unwilling.

24-25                           As (20-23), but the effect lasts 1 hour per CL.

26-28                           As (24-25), but the subject of the spell has enough control over his body that he can attempt to smother another opponent on a successful grappling attack. Smothered opponents must save versus Fortitude each round or be unable to breathe for that round. If he is smothered for 4 consecutive rounds, he will pass out. After 20 rounds, he must make a Fortitude save every round until freed or die from suffocation.

29-33                           As (26-28), and the subject of the spell may “unflatten” to 3 dimensions and back to 2 dimensions twice per hour for the duration of the spell.

34-35                           As (29-33), but, in addition, the subject may float above the ground, like a leaf on the wind, but with enough control to move at half normal movement in any direction. Note that a stiff wind will throw the flattened subject off-course.

36-37                           As (34-35), and the subject may expand his remaining dimensions to up to 3X their natural height and width and reshape his form to anything that stays within the constraints of square footage dictated by the subject’s natural dimensions X3.

38+                              The subject may collapse from 2 dimensions to 1 dimension or back up to 3 dimensions at will. 1-dimensional persons may only be seen or detected by 2-dimensional observers. They will appear to such observers as a ring of ever-changing size, but may reduce themselves to a nearly-undetectable dot at will. Movement for a one-dimensional person in three dimensional space is very quick, taking one round to move three turn’s worth of distance.


  1. Wow! This is very good. Thanks for the hard work. You may have just come up with a patron my picky Wizard will like.

    1. Thanks! Hopefully your picky wizard doesn't get patron taint!